As this school year has progressed, I realized that my babies are growing up! Even though I've been aware of this fact. We all know our kids are going to grow up, right? We all know that they won't be little forever and won't need us for everything for as long as they live. I may be crazy, but this role, as draining and exhausting as it can me, energizes me on a certain level. I LOVE that my kids NEED me. And they still do...just not as much.
Nate is a big 4th grader. His check up last week revealed that he's grown almost 6 inches in a year and gained about 5 pounds. He's long and lean like his Daddy and his maturity shines through when I sometimes realize that he's been missing for hours and I find him in his room, reading a book or listening to a CD. I actually started buying him deodorant a few weeks back! Ahhhh!
We had a dose of reality earlier in the month when a routine dental cleaning revealed that he had a growth on his gums. The dentist thought it resembled a wart and needed to be removed. After an evaluation from the dental surgeon, he called it a fancy name, meaning cyst, and said said we'd have to wait for the path report to determine what kind of cyst. Ever wanted your kids to have warts? For about 2 weeks, that's what I was praying for. We were honest with Nate and explained what was going on. It was him and his Daddy that kept reassuring me that everything would be fine. It wasn't until the night before that fear showed up and after a million prayers went up on his behalf (thank you to my friends and family), he bravely headed for the dental chair alone, per his request. What? This little guy that has always needed me for everything, suddenly became a brave, young adult, that wanted to conquer this surgery, ALONE! I kissed him and sent him off, under a nurses arm instead of mine.
Almost a year to the date, that we were told that my anatomy didn't give me a very good chance of conceiving again, Gabe was born. There's nothing better than proving a doctor wrong! Just another time that our friends and family interceded with prayer, on our behalf. So, because this was my "probably shouldn't be here" child, I held on pretty tight. I reluctantly gave him freedom and and encouraged independence from this little guy, although his strong will fought back pretty hard. I thought he'd be our last and I didn't want him to grow up (this is starting to be a trend, huh?). As time passed, and another miracle was born (Adri), I let go of the reigns a little bit and somehow, this little "probably shouldn't be here" child, became a big Kindergardener. He's strong willed and eager to please. He loves school and learning and is the MASTER of question asking. If there is a kid somewhere on this planet that has asked as many questions as this kid, it'd be a miracle. I spend my time with Gabe answering the most obscure questions. But, contemplating what my great grandma said when she met Matt for the first time, asking a lot of questions, only makes you smarter! She must have been right because that little cherub is sharp as a pin! Gabe never ceases to amaze and teach me. He makes comments like, "Don't be a bucket dumper," when someone says something nasty and continues to take his Bible to school, 'just in case.' He told me last week that he wanted to get a hair cut and spike it just like Daddy. He also informed me that he doesn't want me to cut his hair anymore...he wants to go to a 'real hair cut lady.' We appeased him, and this weekend, he returned from an outing with Daddy, sporting spiky, gel covered hair! Luckily, he still charges at me with a hug and huge grin when he sees me at school...I hope that never stops!
Adrianna started preschool this year and is a typical peer at Pendleton Elementary. There are some kids in her class that have some challenges that she hasn't had to deal with at her age. There is a little girl that sits in a wheelchair most days and sleeps frequently. Adri told me, "She sleeps because her body is just a little tired. She's tired because it's hard being so cute!" I still get teary eyed just thinking about that comment. What compassion! I hope that is something that continues to grow with her and she never forgets what an amazing gift that is. She's eager to learn, just like her brother, Gabe, and has recently expressed interest in gymnastics. We went to our first class this week and although she hesitated a bit at the beginning, she became quite the little leader by the end of class. She's also a deep thinker and analyzer and doesn't skip a beat. Between her and Gabe, my mind certainly gets a workout everyday. There are times that one of them will ask me a question that I can't answer so I'll have to look it up. This weekend, she asked how long it takes for a caterpillar to turn into a butterfly and also what happens to butterflies during the winter. Man, I should have been a science teacher.
All this being said, I've quickly become one of those mother hens that sometimes sits in the henhouse just watching my baby chicks, instead of constantly swooping them up and nestling them under my wings, which is what I really want to do. Now, I realize this will get more difficult as they get older. My guess is that the next big step will be sending Adri off to Kindergarden. I had a chat with a friend last week and she had some encouraging words. If my kids are independent, growing, maturing, relying on prayer and friends and family when they need something, we must be doing something right...RIGHT? So, they may not need me as much as they used to, but that's a good thing.
